About two months ago, I was happily walking up the street coming from grabbing a bite to eat in Davis Square, when I stubbed my right big toe on some uneven sidewalk. Basically, I caught my sandal, had my toe slide across the cement, and it ripped a big flap of skin off.

If blood and/or gross feet weird you out, you probably don’t want to click on the link below.

My Right Toe

For that one, I wrapped it up in a couple of band-aids, and I was able to walk/run on it since it was so high up on my toe.

Cut to last night. Coming back from going with the girl to grab a bite to eat in Davis Square, I stubbed my left big toe on top top stair walking into my house. Of course, I was wearing the same sandals.

Like last time, I didn’t even notice that I had hurt myself until I saw my white Virginia Tech sandals turning pink with blood. This time, when I lifted up my foot, I watched blood gush down onto the floor until I hopped into the shower.

I was bleeding enough that the whole shower turned red. I didn’t think I would be able to close this one up with a couple of band-aids. A few hours, a couple of x-rays, 3 shots of lidocaine, and 4 stitches later, my toe was sewed back together.

Again, not for the squeamish:

My Left Toe

I’m not entirely sure when I lost the ability to walk without tripping on my own feet. But all I know is that it happened, and it hurts.

 

Just a random story from my morning.

I’m leaving my house this morning, packing up all my things, ready to face another Monday at the workplace. I’ve got my laptop packed. My gym bag packed. I throw on my winter coat and hat. I do the pocket check …

Left pocket … wallet … CHECK
Right pocked … iPhone … CHECK

Note: I’m an habitual (a habitual?) pocket checker. I freak out when I’m driving when I notice that my keys aren’t in my pocked. You know, because they’re in the ignition so the car will go Vroom Vroom.

All good. I lumber out the door, pull it shut behind me, and make it down two stairs when I reach for my keys.

They’re not in my pocket.

Nope. They’re on the table. Where I left them. Because I’m a huge dumbass.

Now this is a predicament. My landlord isn’t around. I don’t have a spare key. (Note to self: get spare key). My girlfriend is downtown, at a conference, phone-less.

Also, it’s about 10 degrees out.

This is what is affectionately referred to as being boned.

So, I did what any normal male in this situation would do. I started looking for how to break into my own house.

First trip around the house: none of the easily reachable windows are unlocked (good job by me!). All doors are locked.

Second trip around the house: hey! That window might be unlocked! Except I can’t reach it.

Third trip around the house: I’ll stand on this wobbly trash can. I can reach it! Except the screen is locked in tight. Wait! Is that a screw I see on the ground. I can use this to pry open the screen …. MacGyver-style! Screen is off, windows is open …. hurdle through …. I’m in!

mcgyver-704190.jpg

30 minutes, a rip in my jeans, and a bruised ego and I’m in my apartment.

Just in time to see someone walking by looking scared of the guy who just went through the window.

Fantastic.

I try to tell him I live there, but he feigns not being able to hear me and walks off. I call the police to explain what happened. They laugh and understand and wish me a better day. So kudos to the dispatcher. He was nice.

I grab my stuff. Again. Triple checking that I have my keys this time. Off to work … except there goes a police van … down my street … oh poo. I circle around, but thankfully he was just driving by off to somewhere else, not coming to arrest me for breaking into my own apartment.

And that, my friends, is why you always make sure that you practice breaking into houses. You never know when it’ll come in handy.

 

Give Up

Image courtesty despair.com

For the first time in a very long time (probably > 4 years), I’ve hit the wall and become completely unmotivated. I won’t get into the specific details, but there’s just a hodge-podge (technical term) of work stuff going on that leaves me feeling empty, defeated, and broken. I feel like I’ve actually been a fighter for change (positive change, at that) in this company, and I know that I’ve worked extremely hard to make things better for the company, my co-workers, and our customers.

Don’t get me wrong, the company has (financially) treated me well. I’ve gotten the opportunity to do a lot of great things, and gotten opportunities I wouldn’t have gotten elsewhere.

But I kind of feel like we’re drifting in different directions. The company (as an entity, not necessarily the employees) is headed in one direction, and with that has come changes in tone, process, and even our moral compass. The things that made me excited and energized to come in and change the world have taken a back burner to onerous processes, misguided and (often) conflicting objectives, and just a grand feeling of a lack of efficacy.

So here I sit, entirely demotivated, chugging through the work I have to do, but watching as the little things that we used to do so well and made us successful (and got us to this inflection point) are falling through the cracks, people knowing ignoring them, knowing that they’re going to bite us in a month or two. But since that’s not right now, not this exact moment, no one really cares. Hell, every one of our systems is currently down and has been for a couple of minutes. Not because people are bad at their jobs, but because we aren’t taking the time to do things right.

We’re basically at the point of considering everyone in the company cheap labor. “Don’t worry if it’s scalable or the right solution, just do it and we’ll deal with the consequences.”

Easy to say when you’re not the one getting woken up at 2am.

It’s frustrating, it’s somewhat demeaning, and it’s utterly demotivating.

Sadly, it is fixable, but I don’t think I have it in me to fight to make people recognize that something needs to be fixed. Instead, the only motivation I have right now is to make a change to my own situation.

 

Today we had a visit from a good friend. Our friendly neighborhood office chipmunk (or squirrel). I’m pretty sure this is the guy who used to poop on my desk, before I got my handy-dandy office. He’s probably usually a night time guy, but this morning, he was out and about digging our cubes.

Office Chipmunk

We tried to catch him. He was fast.

Office Chipmunk

A couple of hours later, he showed up in a neighboring office, hanging out in a hat that was on the floor.

Office Chipmunk

That lead to a mad chase into another office, where we cornered him, successfully coaxed him into a trash can, and freed him outdoors into the wild.

He was promptly eaten by a lion

He didn’t really get eaten. Later word was that he tried to get back into the building to hang out with us.

 

Little Pete?

Saw this today browsing the web. I’m pretty sure that’s Little Pete.Stock images from like 15 years ago are awesome.

Pete & Pete is still awesome, by the way. You should know it rules.

© 2011 That Not So Fresh Feeling Suffusion theme by Sayontan Sinha